Comment at a time story.

All those who come across this post must contribute to the ‘Comment at a Time Story’. The first one who stumbles across this post has a very easy job. Just put ‘Once upon a time…’ in the comment box. Job’s a good ‘un!

Just an update now that there’s been 66 comments. Stories have beginnings, middles and ends. There’s been some wild contributions and I’ve enjoyed reading them. Let’s try to find a way to bring it back to a satifying conclusion. Ta.

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67 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. @pennynash
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 10:43:16

    Once upon a time

  2. @pennynash
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 10:45:39

    there was a beautiful balloon fairy.

  3. rita leaman
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 11:09:30

    The beautiful fairy’s balloons were magical and full of special gifts.

  4. Roger Cruse
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 11:11:05

    Who liked to visit Trafalgar Square when it was raining

  5. @pennynash
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 11:28:56

    One of those gifts was an umbrella

  6. Roger Cruse
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 11:31:22

    The umbrella was huge and shaped like a cocktail umbrella

  7. Kim
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 11:47:02

    with a sharp point at its end that often popped the fairy’s balloons as she flew

  8. mittfh
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 12:09:57

    Realising the sharp point was probably not a good idea…

  9. badlypacked
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 12:42:44

    ….she decided to put a large maraschino cherry on the end

  10. Roger Cruse
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 12:58:59

    With a large dollop of fresh cream

  11. @pennynash
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 13:29:01

    The cream fell off on a person called John, who thought it was a passing pigeon

  12. mittfh
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 14:11:36

    John was understandably surprised when he wiped what he assumed was guano off his head, only to discover that it was in fact Devonshire Clotted Cream. Little did he know that by tasting it,

  13. rita leaman
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 14:26:06

    So, with that balloon gift proving a problem, the fairy gave out another balloon with something tiny attached.

  14. Nikole Hahn
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 16:59:58

    …a small bottle with a blessing inside it’s cork. Unfortunately, John recieved it again. He took the wine bottle and tried to get the cork out with his corkscrew. However, the fairy decided to save money and install a rubber cork in the bottle. Grumbling and angry at how the day was going (especially after getting hit by whipped cream), he went to Home Depot and bought a drill in which to open the cork.

  15. Aurorablue
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 18:24:23

    However, the little rubber cork was a magical cork and popped out the bottle all by itself. It then bounced toward John and said, “

  16. mittfh
    Sep 16, 2009 @ 20:30:11

    Put down that devlish device and I will grant you two wishes!”

    “Err…I thought the standard was three?”

    “For genies it is, but…

  17. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 09:25:36

    ‘ I am just a rubber cork. It takes most of my magic just to be able to talk. Stop grumbling and make your wishes’

  18. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 09:32:03

    …for people with who think clotted cream is poo, there are only two, take it or leave it.”

    John thought about it for a couple of minutes, then reluctantly agreed to just the two wishes.

    “For my first, I would like a never-ending supply of money”

    Twoosh! Millions upon millions of….pesetas cascaded onto the floor in a brilliant, shining heap.

    “Pesetas? What good are they?!” cried John “Change them for something that is at least a currency that can be used!”

    “If I do that, then that will be your second wish used up” said the cork

    John thought carefully and, after a few minutes exclaimed “Hah! I’ve got you!! I’m going to make my second wish a wish for as many wishes as I will ever need! Eat that, Mr magic cork!”

  19. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 09:40:02

    The magic cork looked at John in amazement. ‘Ok’ he said A pot appeared that said ‘as many wishes as you will need’. The cork then opened his mouth and ate the pot. ‘you told me to eat it’ smiled the cork

  20. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 09:47:01

    “Ah, so you are a magical cork with Aspergers eh?” said John “whereabouts on the spectrum are you?”

    “Well, it’s really difficult dealing with crowds, I mean I’m no good if I’m in a bottle which gets popped at, say, a wedding and everybody shouts and people look for, wanting to cut a slot in me and put 10p in…”

  21. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 09:54:22

    The thought scared the litle rubber cork so much that a strange noise came out ‘Buuuuurrrh’ went the cork. As its mouth opened the lid of the pot inside popped open and a wish escaped. ‘Buuuurrh, eep’ went the cork as it burped out the wish. John saw the little magic bubble and began to chase it.

  22. Rita
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 09:58:25

    The magic balloon fairy appeared and said, ” you can pop my cork anytime.”

  23. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:05:29

    As John ran down the road after the bubble, it began to rise upwards. As it rose, it expanded and expanded, until…bang!…..it exploded into millions of smaller bubbles, all of which let out little gasps of “buuuuurh eep!” which collectively became so loud that John’s eardrums burst and he fell to the ground, blood trickling between his fingers.

    The magic cork bounced down the road and stopped next to him.

  24. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:08:04

    Unfortunately for John, the magic bubble was much faster than a conventional bubble and he was soon running out of breath trying to chase it. Eventually, a devious thought crossed his mind, and between pants a glimmer of a grin began to appear on his face…

  25. Rita
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:13:30

    Just like magic, the beautiful balloon fairy reappeared and said, “you can pop my cork anytime.”

  26. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:13:49

    We seem to have hit the “spinning circle of death” said the cork, laughing at John “just like has been happening over on the Fourth Plinth, have you seen it?”

    “Oh, you mean where you watch something and then it stops, rewinds and then something else happens?” said John.

    “That’s it!” said the cork “the trouble is, which bit came first, the exploding bubbles, or your devious thought?”

  27. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:14:06

    The magic cork was torn. He knew that John had been conjuring up an evil plan in his mind ,so burst eardrum is what he deserved, but the cork had grown up in the care of the balloon fairy and could not bear to see John in pain.

  28. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:17:10

    The cork had a chat with the magic hamsters and set the wheel of time spinning once again..

  29. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:21:58

    …they all found they jumped forward by ten minutes. The blood on John’s ears had dried and he was gently cradling the magic bubble in his hand. The cork was holding onto Johns’ trouser leg.

    “Ooerr, I never realised I had agrophobia” the cork wailed “please help me get back inside!”

  30. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:33:27

    John looked around. He was vagely aware of planning to do something, but couldn’t remember for the life of him what it was. He was also puzzled as he couldn’t recognise his surroundings – sometime in the missing 10 minutes they had somehow shifted location. But where to? He decided to ask the (increasingly nervous) cork…

  31. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:39:56

    It was no good asking the cork though. He had gone into panic attack mode. All the cork could think about was finding somewhere safe to hide. He needed somewhere warm and dark where he could curl up and hide. His breathing was getting faster, his heart pounding, his eyes wide with fear. The cork was rocking himself and shaking. The urge to hide was getting stronger and stronger. But where would the cork find a warm dark hole to hide around here?

  32. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 10:44:32

    “Where are we, Corkie?” said John

    The cork was shaking and his teeth were chattering of their own accord “I…I…..I….I….I…thi….I….thi…”

    “Come on, spit it out!” said John.

    The cork, having Aspergers, took him at his word and spat the letters on the ground. John counted them: 46 in all, seventeen vowels, the rest consonants.

    “How the hell am I going to make sense of that?” said John, more to himself than anyone else.

  33. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:02:44

    Just then, John saw another wish bubble on the horizon, but was too worn out to chase after it. Besides which, there were so many choices for immediate wishes – finding out where he was, where the balloon fairy was (and/or how to get there), if there was any way of retrieving the wish pot from the cork, curing the cork of its agoraphobia and/or aspergers, explaining how he’d managed to get into this mess in the first place…

    Just then, John was interrupted from his train of thoughts by…

  34. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:08:28

    ..Jane, who wanted him in, for his dinner, this very moment, right now and what the devil did he think he was doing with a cork and why was he throwing great big letters on the floor, nag nag nag…

    John closed his eyes and sighed. He needed to point out to the cork that, actually, his comment to the cork was an instruction and not a wish; ergo, the cork should have granted him as many wishes as he wanted and left it at that.

    Meantime, there was Jane to contend with….

  35. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:08:44

    the sight of a runaway hamster. It had escaped from the spinning wheel of time and was making a run for freedom.

  36. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:12:24

    “Oh my God, we’ve got that damn spinning circle of death again!” shouted John “Hold on everybody, we’re going off somewhere new!”

  37. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:14:21

    As a result of the escaping hamster the time wheel was all over the place again. Here was Johns chance to escape the nagging Jane. He just had to catch the hamster. He laid a trap of peanut m&ms, haribos and biscuits.

  38. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:18:30

    Unfortunately the hamster, although it briefly sniffed the treats, merrily continued on its way, showing no inclinations of wanting to consume them.

    “Damn!” thought John. “If food won’t tempt it, what can?”

    Just then, to compound his problems, his stomach started to rumble and he was sorely tempted to scoff the bait himself. But that would delay catching the hamster of time even more…

  39. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:20:45

    As Jane kept up her incessant nagging, John hid under the bushes, the last haribo in his hand. The hamster appeared, shly at first, then becoming more confident as the food disappeared down his throat. In fact, he became overconfident, failing to notice John’s other hand positioned to grab him by the neck as he stuffed the last Haribo in his mouth.

    “Gotcha! Back to the droid’s cave with you!” shouted John triumphantly, as he wriggled out from the bushes. Unfortunately, in his haste, he forgot that Jane was looking for him, and as he rounded the corner…

  40. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:24:53

    there stood Jane. She looked like Mollie Sugden and was ranting. Suddenly the cork, who had been shaking in a corner, spotted Jane’s open mouth and mistook it for a safe hole to hide in …

  41. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:26:50

    …as with another jolt and glimpse of the spinning circle, John suddenly found himself sitting in the middle of a damp field.

    “Einstein and Schrödinger have a lot to answer for,” he grumbled as the hamster took advantage of the opportunity to escape (again).

  42. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:26:56

    “Ah this damn spinning circle of death gets everywhere!” shouted Jane. “Get back here now” she shouted, but John, the hamster and the cork laughed uproariously as they knew that, any second now, they would be transported to a place far away from her and her nagging voice.

  43. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:27:44

    (Swap the previous two comments and the story will make a bit more sense!)

  44. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:28:15

    “Stop! Everybody stop!” shouted Thurtinkle.

  45. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:44:09

    The exasperated gnome picked up the cork and shook out a wish . ‘ buuuurrhh eep I wish we could start this story all over again’
    Once upon a time …..

  46. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 11:55:38

    …there was a bowl of Kelloggs Crunchies and a meatball, who were the best of friends.

  47. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 12:04:25

    And everywhere the cereal bowl went, the meatball was sure to go.

  48. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 12:14:10

    Eventually the cereal bowl grew tired of the meatball and didn’t want him for a friend any longer. So he waited one night, until the meatball had gone to sleep and then slipped silently downstairs, packed his few meagre belongings, wrote a brief note to the meatball and left quietly, without a backward glance.

  49. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 12:29:31

    The following morning, the meatball was devastated at the news. But, just before it had cried all its gravy out, it spotted a mysterious bubble floating in the air…

    [Of course I’m aiming for an overlap between the two stories!]

  50. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 12:35:26

    The bubble spotted the meatball looking very sad and, feeling sorry for it, floated down and landed next to it.

    “Buuuurh eep! What’s up with you?” said the bubble.

    “My bestest friend in the whole wide world has left me and I’m all on my own!” wailed the meatball.

    “Well, let’s see buuuurh what we can do about that!” said the bubble “Open your mouth and let me eep jump inside you!”

  51. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 13:01:17

    The meatball swallowed the bubble which burst releasing a special wish. The meatball was able to see exactly where his best friend was. However, in his vision, the bowl of cereal semmed to be under attack by…

  52. rita leaman
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 13:26:03

    ..the petrifying cereal killer, known in the region as All Bran the Great. The Great Commander of all cereals. The only cereal that could stop an entire army with one mighty thrust.

  53. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 13:35:11

    “I must get to my friend, he needs my help, urgently!” shouted meatball. As he went to move off – in which direction he was not sure – he was aware of something down at his feet. Looking down he saw it was a snake. He bent down and picked it up.

    “Hello, what’s your name?” he asked.

    “Oh, hello, my name is Kellogg” said the snake.

    “Kellogg? Why that’s my friend’s name too, what a coincidence! But he’s a cereal, which makes sense for him to have that name, why are you called it?” said meatball.

    “Dunno, just the name my parent’s gave me” said the snake “but I am a corn snake, would that have anything to do with it?”

    “Aaah, Kellog corn snake!” laughed meatball “Your parents were being funny! So, will you help me find my friend then, please?”

  54. rita leaman
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 13:57:14

    “Yes”, said Kellog corn snake, ” hop on my back and I will carry you.” Kellog thought, “Ah, now is a good time for plagiarism”

    Kellog corn snake slithered along, with meatball on it’s back. “Meatball, you’re feeling heavy on my back, could you climb up onto my neck please. You will be more comfortable there.”
    So, meatball moved to Kellog’s neck.

    A few slithers later, Kellog said, ” meatball, my neck in aching. Could move onto the tip of my nose. I will be able to see you there too and we can have a good chat.”
    So, meatball moved to the tip of Kellog’s nose and sat chatting away to him.

    Kellog stopped suddenly. Opened his jaws. Flicked out his tongue. And…

  55. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 14:06:17

    …discovered that, despite his breeding, he actually didn’t like the taste of meat and was a closet vegetarian…

  56. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 14:08:55

    …captured a grasshopper sitting on a leaf nearby. He swallowed it down in one go.

    “Phew!” said meatball, “Just for a minute I thought you were planning on eating me!”

    Kellog crossed his eyes together so that he could see Meatball. “Never, my friend, you must trusssssst me……..”

    Meatball felt his eyes growing heavy, but, at same time, thought he could vaguely remember having seen something like this before….was it a film or something? As he tried desperately to think, he felt himself drifting off under the hypnotic gasze of Kellogg…

  57. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 14:09:49

    As he drifted off, he remembered something about spinning circles of death or something like that…

  58. rita leaman
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 14:16:54

    …and then he recalled. It came all too clear to him. A man on a concrete plinth with whirly things that were supposed to light up in the wind, but they didn’t and the man kept going on and on and on about the lack of wind and preparation. On and on and on the man went, until meatball’s head was whirling, but the things weren’t.

    Everything was dark, because there was no light.

  59. minibeastgirl
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 15:31:04

    Meanwhile back at All Bran the Great’s lair, plotting was to be had.

    He had dreamed of greatness his whole life, but that just wasn’t enough. He just wasn’t liked by anyone. Even his own mother had confessed to liking his brother, coco the pop more. Just because he was sweet and entertaining.

    Yeah people said they liked All Bran the Great, but he was sure they just said that to sound intelligent and grown up.

    To be everyone’s favourite bowl of cereal he needed rid the world of the other bowls and that nut, Kellog’s crunchie, was first on his list…

  60. mittfh
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 15:38:24

    As if things weren’t bad enough, he had a strange feeling he was being watched by two metal eyes, but somehow also knew that a third metal eye wasn’t…

    [metal eyes = his perspective on the plinth cameras]

  61. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 17:46:21

    far away. These metal eyes were watching his every move. How could he rid the World of all the cereal bowls with these eyes constantly on him

  62. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 18:15:06

    Nearly two hours later, he still hadn’t thought of anything. He was hungry though. Where to go to eat, without danger of being eaten himself?

  63. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 18:42:38

    Meatball wandered off. The snake had vanished and he was desperate to find something to eat.

  64. @radeeboi
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 18:47:38

    He came across a tree. It had spaghetti growing on it! “Fantastic, I can boil some water and have spag…erm…spag” he thought.

    He began to pick the spaghetti when…

  65. rita leaman
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 19:13:17

    AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

    One of the strands of spaghetti was, in fact…Kellog the corn snake.

  66. @pennynash
    Sep 17, 2009 @ 20:12:02

    Whilst in the tree Kellog the corn snake had spotted where Kellog cruncies was being held hostage

  67. @radeeboi
    Sep 18, 2009 @ 08:56:34

    “Psst! Meatball! Keep quiet and look to your left. See the tree with only the top branch? 10 o’clock from that, 300m, yellow bobble hat just above the bullrushes? Can you see it?”

    “Yes, I see it” said Meatball, “Why, what is that?”

    “That’s where Kellogg Crunchie is” said Kellogg corn snake “We need to make a plan to resuce him!”

    “I’ve got an idea…” said Meatball.

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